As I've stated before my mom had quite the different experiences when it came to giving birth to Josh and me. Before even giving birth, she had some initial problems. After the doctors noticed her blown-up legs and blood pressure, she was advised to be admitted in the hospital the next day. However, figuring that nothing serious was amiss, she went back home and spent the better part of the next day cleaning. When she finally decided it was time to go to the hospital, she was scorned by the doctors for showing up so late. Apparently it was one of those "emergency situations"; she was immediately strapped down to a table. At one distinct point she remembers a bunch of residents around her asking, "are you excited about having that baby tonight?", where she thought "I'm not having my baby tonight... I'm only 33 weeks in..." Needless to say it was an intense experience, Josh being born by cesarian-section and pre-mature at the same time. Josh's heart rate had at one point dropped quite significantly, and the effect of the birth on my mom was disastrous. She was forced to fast (with the exception of the rare ice chip for hydration) for two days, and was made to stay in the hospital for a grand total of 10 days to recover.
In hindsight, this was obviously a scarring experience. The fact that the birth not only nearly cost her life but the baby's affected her both physically and emotionally, and I can see why it would have. To go through all of the pain, to have the chance of regret (by not going to the hospital sooner), to have survived the odds, I would have certainly changed as well. Exactly how she changed, I am not certain of. I would imagine that the experience is part of the reason (either that or my parents had a moment of genius, or both) that she waited 5 years to give birth (to me) again. Also I could totally see her cleaning the house when she's literally about to give birth- the quintessential image of mom (sorry mom, :) I am only kidding of course).
In contrast, my birth was fairly easy and simple compared to Josh's... though it wasn't a walk in the park (or a cleaning of the house). My mom was now 42, which made the doctors fairly wary due to her past birth experiences. Josh, who was now 5 was also feeling quite sick (and would go on to throw up all over the bed). At the hospital, many of the pregnant women (including my mom) were given a certain drug to speed up the process of the birth. The intention of said drug was to make sure my mom did not go past her due date, and to avoid complications. However, much to everyone's surprise, only an hour after being given the drug many of the patients went into labor. Shortly thereafter, my mom went into labor herself! This effect that the drug had was not expected, and the quiet birth ward soon became a ballet of moving beds and a symphony of shrieks. The birth itself was everything BUT her first experience, a straightforward, standard giving of life.
From what I know, this particular experience pretty much undid the nervousness and overall emotional damage created by Josh's birth. I could imagine how frightened my mom was before delivering me, thinking about all of the tragic possibilities she was so lucky to evade the first time around. I guess I should be happy that nothing DID go wrong!! I should also take this time to thank you, mom. When it comes to the time spacing between Josh and I, I really do think 5 years is the perfect difference. I feel like (and this could turn into its own separate post entirely) only children really do miss out on something by not having a brother or sister, and unfortunately most of the time when there ARE siblings there is tension and competition. However, when there is a good amount of time between the two (4-6 years is best IMO), there is not really ever competition because they will almost never be in the same school, and mostly interested in other things. That being said, the older one usually takes on a leadership role for the younger, and the two will still have the close relationship that siblings have.
My aunt K had very different birth experiences. Having already gone through a miscarriage, she had experience in the less forgiving side of birth. When she gave birth to my cousin D, however, it was a very different outcome. Having already gone into labor, my aunt insisted that rather than be taken to the hospital, she be taken to her personal doctor for a check-up. The poor police officers didn't exactly know what to do, but eventually they did as she ordered, and took her to her doctor. Well what do you know! The doctor said she should go right to the hospital! And so she flagged down a taxi and drove to the hospital. It turns out that she arrived in the nick of time, giving birth immediately after arriving. Other than this anecdote... there were no complications.
Of all three birth stories this one seems to me like the one we all imagine, the one we see in the movies and read in the books. Nothing in particular went wrong, but it seemed like there were moments of drama and anticipation that all "normal" births seem to have in our dominant society. Furthermore, like my mom's giving of birth to me, it seems to have undone whatever trauma was created by the first experience.
If I were here, I'd really like to know what stigmas there are associated with birth, and perhaps more specifically, what/why stigmas apply to teen births/pregnancies.
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